Thursday, September 21, 2006

The Secret of Eternal Youth

Hello blog people!

One is writing this post from up the wall, which one's maternal parent drove one up, in the three days that she was visiting.

While the said parent has left Bombay, and is now driving the Delhi-based siblings up their Delhi-based walls, one thinks one will just stay up here for a while. You know, just in case she has left behind the ghosts of her drive-your-children-up-the-wall personality.

(And while one realises that one is probably a horrid little thing, one has a rather interesting view from up here. For one, one can see the tops of all your heads. Ha ha!)

One still wakes up in the middle of the night with that measured-yet-menacing voice in one's ear.

"Why are your masala bottles so grimy?! Where do you stack the unironed clothes? Why doesn't the bai clean the dishes well? Why don't you ever tell her anything? What kind of household are you running?!"

And one is, once again, reduced to a quivering, crying broken shell of a woman.

An interesting facet of human behaviour comes to light though, that namely, all quivering and crying is done in retrospect. For the three days that the MP had the run of the household, one had automatically slipped into rebellious-teenager mode.

One did - with much aplomb, mind you - the whole exasperated-eye-roll, the I-can't-believe-you're-saying-that look of horror and the could-you-possibly-embarrass-me-anymore saucer-eyed-expression.

The poor pater, in his characteristically resigned manner, contented himself with talking to the SB about everything under the sun, and buying mountains of fruit*. And occasionally letting out despairing cries of, "Why isn't anyone eating any fruit??"

So it seems, that the secret of eternal youth is (insert portentous silence HERE), "Invite thine parents over for a couple of days" (and thunder and lightning...NOW!).


On the other hand, one wonders what use this transient youth is, if one is going to spend all of it perched up on a wall?



* Which is another 'father' thing. One is beginning to think that in dad-school, one of the first lessons they teach you is, "Nothing says 'I love you' to your offspring, more than a bowl of assorted fruit. Make that two."

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hilarious post!

Beth Loves Bollywood said...

V glad am not the only one who still does the eye-roll at my maternal parent.

Can you see all the way to Amrika from up there? Am totally waving at you.

Nandya said...

so true abt the bowl of fruit...:))

Anonymous said...

And in the case of my Father, he will insist on sprinkling some salt and chilli powder on it. INSIST. He will grab the bowl while you eat to do it.

Anonymous said...

According to me, the secret of Eternal youth is Make your passion your profession since profession takes up a majority of waking hours.

Chronicus Skepticus said...

V: Thank you. Glad you liked!

Beth:
> V glad am not the only one who still does the eye-roll at my maternal parent.

You do it too?? That makes me feel so much better about myself!

> Can you see all the way to Amrika from up there? Am totally waving at you.

Hello Amreeka! Hello Beth! *waving back*

And when's your next trip here?

Nandya:

*sigh* Yes. And while I really *like* fruit, what he doesn't seem to understand is, there's only so much of it you can eat!

Ph: LOL! that's a new one! I think mine skipped that particular class. :D

Hiren:
> According to me, the secret of Eternal youth is Make your passion your profession since profession takes up a majority of waking hours.

Well, that's true enough, but you see, I was going for funny...you know, as in 'Ha ha!'

Oh well.

Bombay Addict said...

Um..wasn't there a tag here somewhere you were supposed to do ?

Anonymous said...

LOL, lady...you are truly and supremely hilarious! May I toss you an orange or an apple while you're up on the wall?

Anonymous said...

tsk tsk...dont be mean D! after all daddy was just trying to tell you what i have been telling V for months now! fruits are good for ur health...they give u enery...they...hey bhagwan!!!! am i already turning into one of THEM!!!!! naheeeeeennnn

no wonder V looks at me with such suspiscion every time i go close to the fridge!

Beth Loves Bollywood said...

"Next visit." Tee hee. Actually, I've already been plotting about coming next November/December/January/February-ish. (2007-8, that is).

Unless, of course, I have some shopping to do, for some unknown and unexpected reason, and will require your guidance and conspiration! [giant stage wink]

Arthur Quiller Couch said...

Bridget Jones meets Dave Barry. Kind of nice.

Anonymous said...

u are after all the fruit of their labour :)

Anonymous said...

You OWE us a post. Hmph.

Anonymous said...

Hey...where are you lady??

Did you check the email I sent ya?

Anonymous said...

So totally true :D.. I'm often just a whisker away from yanking all the hair on my head - simultaneously. And maybe wanting to run on the streets, screaming like the female version of Tarzan.

What is it with mothers and their inherent distaste for their daughter's maids?